I just had no idea. No clue. What is/was love? I never truly knew until I fell in Love with mySelf. It’s the Greatest Love in this physical reality. “You’re OK.” “I kind of like you.” “You’re cool…I guess.” Those are the kind of things I would think or feel. After the Shift, something dawned on me. I Loved Me. It’s this love that gave me the strength to let my girlfriend, Eiris, go. I do LOVE her. I came to realize it was different though. It wasn’t fair to her or myself to keep the relationship going (her in Germany and me back stateside). It wasn’t in my mind at the time, almost a year ago, but it began to take shape and form recently. “She” is out there. She is looking for me as well. Well. I guess “looking” kind of doesn’t describe “it”. Waiting. A Waiting. Waiting for that moment when we are in alignment. When that moment comes, we will be walking next to each other all of the sudden and realize we have always been walking next to each other. When? Good question. Whenever the moment of alignment occurs. A day? Maybe a couple months. 10yrs. Who knows with these things…
It is a direction our Sun is taking us through this Galaxy. We’ve made this trip before. Well. Not us personally. Personally, we see ourselves traveling around the Sun 365 days a year. The Sun is a Traveler as well and we are along for the ride. It actually has something to do with how I “woke up” as if in a deep sleep. And the Sun continues on a course it knows so well and yet unchartered waters for our 3D forms (Body/Mind). The Spirit aspect already KNOWS and continues its waiting for The Next Moment. What is “this” Eternity we are heading toward? I do not know anything specific whatsoever. A Feeling. We are heading into Something Wonderful. The closer we get, the stronger I feel. There has been the New Feeling as of late. Thanks to the Universe directing me back to Christian D. Larson, I rediscovered Poise and Power and finally read the book after owning it for almost a year. I seemed to be content with listening to the first four chapters on youtube. Finally. I was ready. This incredible strength that had been growing and growing, combined with the Peace that was re-experienced a year ago was developing and molding into this This Poise. I had a name for it now. Poise. But even now as I am giving consideration to this word, I know it is changing and Growing into More. Whatever the “more” is, I’m not sure there is an earthly/human word to describe It. Maybe that is why I am here. Maybe that was why the Voice told me to begin writing this story. I am heading into Eternity. Eternity is Now. Forever.
I got away. Here. Not that there was any pressure getting to me. There was none. The Voice spoke, I Listened, and here I am. A Get-Away weekend with Nature. I have met a few cats, a couple peacocks, a deer, some wildflowers, trees, birds (some high gliding birds of prey as well), and of course the Lake. A Get-Away, not a run away, more like “getting back to the basics”. Writing. Reading new things (The Great Within, Tao te Ching), reconnecting with old, which are like NEW all over again (Your Forces and How to Use Them, The Pathway of Roses). It’s been raining. Good Nature Nourishment. Was looking for a sunny sunrise over the lake but there is always tomorrow. It’s fine. Everything is happening as it is Happening. The Sun has not gone anywhere.
And there It IS. Harmony. A True Balance of the aspects of Physicality, Mentality, Spirituality. To continually achieve Harmony, you have to what I call Tending Your Garden. Daily. Gardens need nurturing else they will not flourish. You give it water, fertilizer, pull the weeds. Pulling the weeds is vital unless you would like your garden overtaken. Hence, FREE Will. A choice that the Majority choose not to keep a prosperous garden. Oh they may take care to keep a beautiful body, but the soul is in despair and ugly things permeate the mind. Maybe great attention is given to soulful prayers with determined faith and conviction but…they care little for what they ingest into their body, their temple, and have let themselves go.
Feed and nourish ALL THREE ASPECTS DAILY and you will find Balance, Peace, and Harmony.
And here I sit contemplating at Canyon Lake Resort (4 Apr 14), The Deep Faith. I can Hear the Quiet watching. Always Watching. Non-interference. Just always waiting for…the Next, and the Next, and the Next. (There is a certain humor there that I am hesitant to discuss in the moment). This Quiet Always Stillness Presence just IS. No judgement. Just THERE. I know that it is the basis where the Voice manifests. I had come to refer to It (me) as my Higher-Self. And I know without question or doubt that this Awareness is Infinite. It is God. That aspect of God individualized in Me. Take a microscopic molecule of water from the vast ocean. The ocean is still there in that tiny spec, just individualized. My Spirit, my Soul, the tiniest molecule removed from the Infinite Vastness of Source, of God.
As Above, so below.
The same applies here as to the other two aspects (Body, Mind). Laying the Foundation, continue to build, creating newer and even stronger foundations. The daily reminder. Prayer – Meditation. You cannot fully live in the external 3-D world unless you live in, explore, and fully express The Great Within.
The Stillness within. The Serenity that is. I finally found mySelf about a year ago. Four months after The SHIFT. I had been feeling this Presence more and more profoundly. What is This? When finally, the Voice spoke up. This is Peace. I “knew” this Feeling. I remembered. It had been so long. Since I was a baby. The continuous distractions thrown at us forces us to forget as we struggle to “keep up” with the reality presented to us. Purifying my body, training my mind, allowed me to remember who I am. So, one day after having come to terms with the Stillness that was always there, lying in bed, I asked the question. THE QUESTION. Who Am I? The response came back with such profound depth and surety. I Am Good. The tears flowed immediately. It was something else that I forgot. I always knew I was good (as a little boy). I grew up and battled “the distractions”, the negatives. Amnesia followed. We have forgotten so much. Meditation is necessary. You need to allow time for your Self. Even if it is just allowing yourself to breathe. A daily connection to You. And Prayer. I am not religious. Spiritual. So, after several months of prayer and meditation I began to Feel something else stirring. When I asked about it the answer I received was…The Deep Faith.
The Canyon Lake Retreat – The Mind
Our “intellect” is what it is. So bio/socio it is. We think therefore We Are. So why not think the Best of Thought. I always knew I was so much more. The Voice in the back of my head nudging me forward…and the “Mind” holding me back. Fears and doubts…make for cloudy skies. We are so so so easily trained. TV does it daily with the Majority (programs/programming). I looked back 20yrs ago and found a distinct period where I was so easily trained. I Am a Marine. They are the best of the US military branches in that Mental aspect of shaping/growing Marines. Why couldn’t I do that to myself? To think only good and wholesome thoughts. As with the Body, I needed to establish a foundation. For me it was The Optimist Creed by Christian d. Larson from the book, Your Forces and How to Use Them. A daily repetition (three times a day to begin with for a couple of months) of these words had a profound effect on my Mental Conditioning. I had already (several years ago) removed TV but next removed reading news, social media outlets. Anything that had the potentiality to produce negative thought. Gone. All that remains (and Grows) is all that is Good. A year later and I decided to build (more). Lumosity. Brain games. Still a work in progress as we continue to lay stronger and yet STRONGER Foundations.
Thinking without Feeling. Feeling without Thinking. Letting. Allowing. Being. And without further drama, plus the effects, we Move On and Up.