Six years ago, and a few months into my Shift in Awareness, I became absorbed by the notion of infinity. I couldn’t shake it. I got infinity paintings and pictures, plus a very cool wooden sculpture. These things all led up to having the infinity symbol tattooed to my upper right shoulder. Christmas that year found me enjoying the holidays with my Soul Sisters and they ensured I had the perfect BenGi Santa hat to celebrate with. After I returned home, and was unpacking, Santa hat fell to the floor. I picked it up and the first thing I saw was my infinity sculpture. Really without thinking, I went over and placed the hat on the sculpture. Infinite Christmas, I thought. A constant reminder to enjoy and celebrate every single day. This Gift of Life we have on a continuous basis.
Over the next year, the sisters came to visit me every now
and then and remarked about how cool it was having Infinite Christmas around me
every day. It must have really struck an
elegant note with them as they had a very special pillow made for me. A Christmas present that following year. Little messages of what they thought made up Me. In the center of it, and in gold letters, Infinite Christmas. It is probably one of the Greatest Christmas
presents I ever received.
I guess my message is this:
Surround yourself with things that are a Reminder of this Gift of Life. It doesn’t have to be an Infinite
Christmas. Listen to your Heart. It will tell you how to honor your Life.
Because I live my life like a mirror, I reflect which I am most
enveloped by. I Choose to be surrounded
by beautiful and amazing things to include a Christmas without end.
A few months ago, I was guided to participate in a local
Meetup. This Meetup’s focus was on
gathering together to create a vision board.
Utilizing the Law of Attraction, the vision board we create will help
focus our intentions on becoming a reality.
For myself, this gathering was more of “getting out there” and trying
something new, plus meeting new like-minded (Law of Attraction) people. I really didn’t have anything in mind of what
I wanted to attract into my life aside from what I already have. But fortunately, I was able to find just the
right magazines to hone in on that. My Vision
can be summed up straight down the center of the board where: My Vision Starts
Here. Love Above All; Inside Joy (with a
mirror next to it to reflect my Joy and continuously have that Joy reflected
back to me); FAITH. After I had that I
was pretty much done…except it just looked so empty on the sides. The side worked which intended to be just “window
dressing” actually happened to fit in Just Right. Exactly what I needed.
It was slightly embarrassing towards the end when we went around the table to discuss what we came up with. Folks were looking to attract piles of money, romance, exotic vacations, beautiful homes etc, and then, me 😊. It wasn’t really embarrassing for me, but I could Feel some uncomfortable energy coming from others. I could Feel a little embarrassment of their (in their mind) selfish “wantings”. After feeling that unexpected energy, I felt a need to elaborate a little more. The feeling of internal Personal Happiness will by default, naturally Attract the things you want most out of life. I felt a little better after that. Lighter. The mood got less dense and hopefully I just created some Inspiration on another’s Journey.
The humor I mentioned much earlier…Well…It’s funny. A year ago, in May (2013 as this retreat was in 2014), I was on the early morning run, somewhere between 0430-0500, running down Flower Mound Rd in Lawton, OK when all of the sudden the Voice in my head said, “STOP.” I did. “Turn around.” I did. “Look up.” I did and saw the vastness of space, and the stars and…what the…? A star flashed brightly. Perplexed I started to turn around, but I looked again, FLASH <again!>. Incredible. I was astonished but felt good, safe. I was about to start running but had this thought. I have some kind of star map app on my phone. Held it up and gave the star that flashed a name. Alderamin. Never heard of it. Anyway, this all doesn’t sound all that funny but a couple weeks later, about the same time of the morning, different road, the Voice said, “STOP, look up…” I’m like, OK? I see stars! That’s it? When all of the sudden over my headphones I hear, “CAPTAIN, INCOMING MESSAGE!” (Mr. Worf from Star Trek, incoming text/email sound byte). And then what I felt/heard…Laughter. Like someone was playing a cosmic prank on me! Funny. (There is a lot of them but just hitting a couple of the biggies) A few months later at my friend/soul sister’s apartment just after the whole Beth Episode (maybe some other day) and was walking from her bathroom back to the living room (barefoot), thinking about Beth, a strange quirky smile and this indescribable FEELING and…SPLAT. Walked right onto Sushi or Snoopy’s dog poo. Heard the Laughter again. There IS this playful sense of humor in the Universe which has fun with us all the time and when you are tuned in, you can laugh too 😀
There is never goodbye.
Just till the next moment. My Moment
at Canyon Lake is moving into the next moment.
It was Quiet. It was Fun. I Am Here to Have Fun. BUT. I
am also here to Help. A kind word here
and there. Ernest advice. An ear to Listen. A Smile…Infinitely
That thing that beats in your chest. The thing that generates 5,000 times more electromagnetic energy than the brain. The first organ to manifest into existence. The Heart. Sends more commands to the brain than vice versa. We had it wrong. The heart of the matter IS the Heart. As humans, we are feeling creatures. The feelings generate in the heart, communicated to the brain which translates into…thought. Go figure. The only problem has been that EGOic part which thinks it’s in control. Thinks it knows what’s going on. Has no clue and is very Very VERY small. The part of the mind that makes a good run at Edging God Out. I can’t take credit for that term/phrase. Dr. Wayne Dyer. Back in the day there were times I “Knew” (in the back of my mind) that the Heart was so much more. I could feel in my chest growing and expanding with joy when I saw Carrie (ex-wife) walk down the aisle in Chautauqua, NY, and conversely the feeling in the same area after I found out she was with someone else and was leaving me. Withering, dying, crying. So. We are these Feeling Beings and are able to do these things with that miraculous Heart. It’s my belief that we are hard-wired to be Happy and Joyful, and the majority who do not express this do so out of choice. Why? Who knows. Free Will. The Experience. Goes back to the aforementioned “being human” previously written about. After The Shift it was like my Heart became a balloon. Buoyant. Uplifted. Most of all, Happy.
An Experience. To
what end? The Spiritual Being of Love
and Light manifested into physical form.
Why would such a Being do this?
Can you even fathom what it would be like to be pure Energy, pure
Love? All the other individualizations
of the One all experiencing the same.
Enter the physical realm. Be “Born”. Live. Experience. Grow/Expand.
Find yourSelf. Fall back into
Love. Well. I guess to put it mildly, I am more referring
to Me here, but not everyone wants to have the same experience. Some feel MORE by the suffering incurred upon
them, which makes them appreciate the Love/Light they are even more. And then there’s Me. I did suffer.
Mostly self-induced in retrospect.
It seemed like I was always one step away from my Awakening. Something would always “happen” though. Some tragedy or travesty, some “whatever”
that would send me back down the levels of consciousness. I finally got through to the physical vessel
which carries Me. We are Spirit of The
One Source and we will continue on in this Eternal Moment when the physical is
The “Smile” is something that the Voice suggested that I do
not talk about, I haven’t. and don’t plan on it. Writing about it is something different and
“I Am a Smile” is one of the many I Am phrases I say each
morning. As a matter of fact, one day I
noticed in the mirror, I was (in a resting facial expression) a smile waiting
to happen. I came to the realization
that it wasn’t just the physical Me smiling, it was my Soul smiling at the
Universe. And here is the thing the
Voice suggested not bringing up in the thousand conversations I have had in the
past year…I see the Universe smiling back at me. Where?
Everywhere. Clouds. Smudge marks.
Indecipherable lines on a table converging (as my cosmic eyes have
sharpened) into a pleasant countenance.
The list is endless. Not
important. Maybe the How or Why
are. The Reflection. The Universe (God) is like a mirror,
acknowledging, smiling back. It was a
little strange at first. I quickly became accustomed to it. Even now in this moment as I write, I look
over at my moldavite stone crystal and see a smile as plain as a sunny
It is a liberating feeling in knowing that Time does not
exist. Well. It does and it doesn’t. The human mind created it. A need to measure duration. Beginnings & Endings. So in that sense “Time” is real. We are creators in the exact likeness of
God. That being said, I know that Time
is not real. It’s a Feeling. The Feeling that all there is IS this Moment. An Eternal Moment without end and which never
began. Paradoxical, I know. Contradictory, sure. A Gut Feeling, you bet. Everything in the past is gone and yet kept
alive as much as we want in our own minds.
The future is a series of moments that we haven’t reached yet. Forever is Eternally Now. The Moment that never ends, the Moment that
never begins. The Moment that just