I decided to pull a card today from the Butterfly Oracle
Cards for Life Changes by Doreen Virtue.
I wanted to write something at least once a week and the Wednesday mid-week
scene seemed the best time. I just was a
bit unsure though. I have a lot to talk
about but some of these things just do not feel right, right now. Hence the card pulling and see what I Feel
from that. Body Changes. Well that’s interesting. Definitely a lot has transpired there in the
last 25yrs or so. The funny/amazing
thing is that now that I am closing in on 50 in six months, I feel better than
I did at age 20. Seriously, it’s fascinating. I remember in my 20s I would develop
injuries/pain in my ankles and shins back in my Marine Corps days. In my 30s, I was having issues with my knees
on a regular basis. By late 30s/early
40s it was my lower back on top of all of that.
I was breaking down as the years wore on. But……….
By age 43 I changed what I ate (became a vegetarian) and developed my holistic mind/body/spirit regimen. Six years later, as I reflect on the time that has gone by…I feel Great. So much so that I signed up for my next marathon, albeit not until Jan 2020 (and will be approx. a week after I turn 50). The body mind spirit connection is so incredible and you hear these truly inspiring stories out there about older individuals completing the most monumental achievements. I think the one that sticks out the most is a 94yr old lady who was a two-time cancer survivor who became the oldest woman to complete a half-marathon (San Diego Rock-n-Roll 2017), BUT it wasn’t two years earlier that she became the oldest woman to complete a full marathon at 92. Amazing.
The human body is an incredible machine if you treat it
with the utmost respect that it deserves………it’s You.
The humor I mentioned much earlier…Well…It’s funny. A year ago, in May (2013 as this retreat was in 2014), I was on the early morning run, somewhere between 0430-0500, running down Flower Mound Rd in Lawton, OK when all of the sudden the Voice in my head said, “STOP.” I did. “Turn around.” I did. “Look up.” I did and saw the vastness of space, and the stars and…what the…? A star flashed brightly. Perplexed I started to turn around, but I looked again, FLASH <again!>. Incredible. I was astonished but felt good, safe. I was about to start running but had this thought. I have some kind of star map app on my phone. Held it up and gave the star that flashed a name. Alderamin. Never heard of it. Anyway, this all doesn’t sound all that funny but a couple weeks later, about the same time of the morning, different road, the Voice said, “STOP, look up…” I’m like, OK? I see stars! That’s it? When all of the sudden over my headphones I hear, “CAPTAIN, INCOMING MESSAGE!” (Mr. Worf from Star Trek, incoming text/email sound byte). And then what I felt/heard…Laughter. Like someone was playing a cosmic prank on me! Funny. (There is a lot of them but just hitting a couple of the biggies) A few months later at my friend/soul sister’s apartment just after the whole Beth Episode (maybe some other day) and was walking from her bathroom back to the living room (barefoot), thinking about Beth, a strange quirky smile and this indescribable FEELING and…SPLAT. Walked right onto Sushi or Snoopy’s dog poo. Heard the Laughter again. There IS this playful sense of humor in the Universe which has fun with us all the time and when you are tuned in, you can laugh too 😀
There is never goodbye.
Just till the next moment. My Moment
at Canyon Lake is moving into the next moment.
It was Quiet. It was Fun. I Am Here to Have Fun. BUT. I
am also here to Help. A kind word here
and there. Ernest advice. An ear to Listen. A Smile…Infinitely
That thing that beats in your chest. The thing that generates 5,000 times more electromagnetic energy than the brain. The first organ to manifest into existence. The Heart. Sends more commands to the brain than vice versa. We had it wrong. The heart of the matter IS the Heart. As humans, we are feeling creatures. The feelings generate in the heart, communicated to the brain which translates into…thought. Go figure. The only problem has been that EGOic part which thinks it’s in control. Thinks it knows what’s going on. Has no clue and is very Very VERY small. The part of the mind that makes a good run at Edging God Out. I can’t take credit for that term/phrase. Dr. Wayne Dyer. Back in the day there were times I “Knew” (in the back of my mind) that the Heart was so much more. I could feel in my chest growing and expanding with joy when I saw Carrie (ex-wife) walk down the aisle in Chautauqua, NY, and conversely the feeling in the same area after I found out she was with someone else and was leaving me. Withering, dying, crying. So. We are these Feeling Beings and are able to do these things with that miraculous Heart. It’s my belief that we are hard-wired to be Happy and Joyful, and the majority who do not express this do so out of choice. Why? Who knows. Free Will. The Experience. Goes back to the aforementioned “being human” previously written about. After The Shift it was like my Heart became a balloon. Buoyant. Uplifted. Most of all, Happy.
The Stillness within. The Serenity that is. I finally found mySelf about a year ago. Four months after The SHIFT. I had been feeling this Presence more and more profoundly. What is This? When finally, the Voice spoke up. This is Peace. I “knew” this Feeling. I remembered. It had been so long. Since I was a baby. The continuous distractions thrown at us forces us to forget as we struggle to “keep up” with the reality presented to us. Purifying my body, training my mind, allowed me to remember who I am. So, one day after having come to terms with the Stillness that was always there, lying in bed, I asked the question. THE QUESTION. Who Am I? The response came back with such profound depth and surety. I Am Good. The tears flowed immediately. It was something else that I forgot. I always knew I was good (as a little boy). I grew up and battled “the distractions”, the negatives. Amnesia followed. We have forgotten so much. Meditation is necessary. You need to allow time for your Self. Even if it is just allowing yourself to breathe. A daily connection to You. And Prayer. I am not religious. Spiritual. So, after several months of prayer and meditation I began to Feel something else stirring. When I asked about it the answer I received was…The Deep Faith.
Here it is. My getaway four-day weekend at Canyon Lake while I was stationed in San Antonio almost five years ago now. I had this journal, The Wave, that I had gotten months prior but only used to capture either strange dreams or odd events that transpired around me. Finally, I had a chance to put it to some real good use. A Retreat for Me and to allow words just flow into me without much thought. Reflect on my feelings of the past year in a variety of topics that came to me when they came to me. It’s pretty private and I had never intended to share, BUT after this week everything has shifted into a new gear. Fourteen sections beginning with today’s section.
The Deep Faith
A Heading into Eternity
Forever Now – Time
The Heart Grows Fonder
Captain, Incoming Message
Story (with Brevity in Mind)
There is no beginning and no end. Hell of a way to start a story. It’s just a Way. My Way.
I didn’t intend to write anything.
You know how that “Voice” goes though.
If you surrendered, then you Always Listen.
The body is Amazing.
Trillions of components (actually infinite) all making the whole. It’s the vehicle that makes this physical dimension
possible. The body is the key to
developing the other aspects of Self. (Spirit/Mind) There are these tremendously appropriate
sayings we’ve always heard. You are what
you eat. Garbage in Garbage out. So true.
I like to think of it as Respect.
Do you respect yourSelf. Do
you? How can the body even begin to have
a chance being in a State of Joy. A statement. Not questioning. Each and every cell, every atom needs
nourishment of substance in order to Thrive.
This was the Beginning (but not really) for me. It can start anywhere. Mind/Body/Spirit. The goal of which is Harmony. All working together separately and as One. A plan needs to be established for the daily
sustenance which enriches the Body. What
is, where is this Plan? It is
communicated through the Spirit and Intellect.
It develops and Grows, and…It is for You. The important thing is to BEGIN to lay a
FOUNDATION. Make it SOLID. Continue to Build. Never stop going Up.